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Watch: Christian Borle as Sexy Shakespeare: It’s Hard to Be The Bard

Something Rotten B-Roll

Christian Borle plays William Shakespeare as a kind of Elizabethan Era Elvis in “Something Rotten.”
Here he is performing “IT’s Hard to Be The Bard” at the Stars in the Alley free concert on May 27, 2015.
Below are the lyrics to the song.

SHAKESPEARE:
MY DAYS ARE SO BUSY IT’S MAKING ME DIZZY
THERE’S SO MUCH I GOTTA DO
IT’S LUNCHES AND MEETINGS AND POETRY READINGS AND ENDLESS INTERVIEWS
GOTTA POSE FOR A PORTRAIT
AND HOW I DEPLORE SITTING THERE FOR ETERNITY
THEN IT’S OFF TO THE INN
WHERE MY INNKEEPER FRIEND WANTS TO NAME A DRINK AFTER ME
THEN IT’S BACK TO MY ROOM, WHERE I RESUME
MY ATTEMPT TO WRITE A HIT
) JUST ME AND MY BEER AND THE TERRIBLE FEAR
THAT I MIGHT BE LOSING IT

SHAKESPEARE/MAN SERVANTS (IT’S HARD)
(IT’S HARD)
AND IT’S HARD
IT’S HARD
IT’S REALLY, REALLY HARD – SO VERY VERY HARD I MAKE IT LOOK EASY BUT HONEY BELIEVE ME IT’S HARD (IT’S HARD)
IT’S HARD (IT’S HARD)
IT’S SO INCREDIBLY HARD
SO INCONCEIVABLY, UNBELIEVABLY HARD
IT’S HARD TO BE THE BARD
(to his entourage)
Honestly, I don’t know how I do it. I mean, there’s only
so much of me that can go around.
SHAKESPEARE/MAN SERVANTS
I GOT SO MANY FANS
WITH SO MANY DEMANDS
I CAN HARDLY GO TAKE A PISS
BE IT THEATER FREAK OR
THE AUTOGRAPH SEEKER
THEY ALL WANT A PIECE OF THIS (GIMME, GIMME).
SHAKESPEARE/MAN SERVANTS IT’S A CROSS THAT I BEAR
I’M LIKE JESUS, I SWEAR (AH, OOOH)
IT’S A BURDEN BUT I SUFFER THROUGH IT (HE IS SUFFERING) IT’S ALL PART OF THE GAME, THE TRAPPINGS OF FAME (AH, OOOH) BUT SOMEBODY’S GOTTA DO IT (SO HE DOES IT)

SHAKESPEARE/MAN SERVANTS AND I KNOW, I KNOW, I GOTTA GO (GOTTA GO)
AND GET BACK TO MY PEN AND INK (OOOOOH, AHHHH)
OH DON’T MAKE ME DO IT, DON’T MAKE ME GO THROUGH IT
(calling to his manservant) CAN SOMEBODY GET ME A DRINK!
SHAKESPEARE/MAN SERVANTS ‘CAUSE IT’S HARD (IT’S HARD) IT’S HARD (IT’S HARD)
IT’S REALLY, REALLY HARD
IT’S SEXY BUT IT’S HARD
THIS BAR THAT I’M RAISING TO BE THIS AMAZING IT’S HARD (IT’S HARD)
(OOOH)
(AH, OOOH) (HE CAN’T PEE) (AH, OOOH)
63.
IT’S HARD (IT’S HARD) IT’S SO ANNOYINGLY HARD
SO UNAVOIDABLY UNENJOYABLY HARD
IT’S HARD TO BE THE BARD, BABY
(turning to his men)
I know writing made me famous, but being famous is just so
much more fun.
(sings)
WHAT PEOPLE JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND
IS THAT WRITING’S DEMANDING
IT’S MENTALLY CHALLENGING AND IT’S A BORE
IT’S SUCH A CHORE
TO SIT IN A ROOM BY YOURSELF
Oh my god, I just hate it!
AND YOU’RE TRYING TO FIND
AN OPENING LINE OR A BRILLIANT IDEA
AND YOU’RE PACING THE FLOOR
AND SEARCHING FOR JUST A BIT OF DIVINE INTERVENTION
THAT ONE LITTLE NUGGET THAT ONE LITTLE SPARK
THEN EUREKA! YOU FIND IT YOU’RE READY TO START
SO NOW YOU CAN WRITE, RIGHT? WRONG!
YOU’RE NOT EVEN CLOSE, YOU REMEMBER THAT DAMN IT, YOUR PLAY’S GOTTA BE IN IAMBIC PENTAMETER!
THEN YOU WRITE DOWN A WORD BUT IT’S NOT THE RIGHT WORD SO YOU TRY A NEW WORD BUT YOU HATE THE NEW THE WORD AND YOU NEED A GOOD WORD BUT YOU CAN’T FIND THE WORD OH WHAT IS IT, WHERE IS IT, WHERE IS IT, WHAT IS IT UGGGGGHHHHH

BorleastheBard2

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About New York Theater
Jonathan Mandell is a 3rd generation NYC journalist, who sees shows, reads plays, writes reviews and sometimes talks with people.

2 Responses to Watch: Christian Borle as Sexy Shakespeare: It’s Hard to Be The Bard

  1. I’m glad you posted the lyrics. Is the music that loud in the show?

    • Richie says:

      No, when you see it on Broadway the audio balance is much better. Don’t worry. Go see it.

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